


Turnabout

by Rose Argent (roseargent)



Category: Sono Te wo Dokero | Hands Off!
Genre: Case Fic, Fix-It of Sorts, Gen, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-20
Updated: 2015-12-20
Packaged: 2018-05-07 20:41:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,958
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5470187
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roseargent/pseuds/Rose%20Argent
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>High school is over, and now it's Kotarou keeping things hidden from Tatsuki.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Turnabout

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Poi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Poi/gifts).



> I fully agree on the stupidity of the amnesia ending, so doing away with that was my starting point for this story. I thought it would be interesting to have Kotarou in the position Tatsuki was in for much of the manga--trying to take everything on his shoulders to spare Tatsuki--and here you have the result. 
> 
> I like to think that they head off in a slashy direction after the end of this story, but they didn't quite make it there yet, I'm afraid.
> 
> Hope you like it!

Hey. I'm Oohira Kotarou. I'm 19 years old, 167cm tall, and currently a _ronin_ studying for my next shot at my dream university. In my so-called spare time I work at a convenience store to help cover the cost of living in Tokyo, and sometimes I manage to squeeze in the occasional basketball game in the park just to keep from going crazy. 

Also, I solve crimes with my psychic cousin, Tatsuki, and our also-psychic friend, Yuuto. And sometimes Yuuto's girlfriend, Karen. 

I'm not psychic, and neither is Karen, but at least she has useful skills for solving crime--she's a photographer, and kind of a genius at capturing important stuff on film. Which is why mostly my job seems to be answering the phone, talking to the victims, and being accidental _bait_. It's kind of a crappy job, but it's not like I can just not get involved; I'm like a magnet for this stuff, anyway, and I'm not so heartless that I'm going to bail on the victims.

It was Yuuto's idea to turn what we'd been doing for most of high school into a job--if we kept stumbling into dangerous mysteries we might as well get paid for solving them, right? But the thing is, when you _stumble_ into a crime, it's not like you can turn around and say "So, I saved you. Can you pay me now?" Well, you can, but aside from being a dick move it's kind of close to extortion. We get a few clients by word of mouth, but mostly we still end up doing it for free. The only one with even a semi-steady caseload is Karen, because she takes all the cheating-spouse cases. 

My ex-girlfriend used to help out, too, and I really miss having someone who's both smart and emotionally _normal_ around to balance out the weirdos, but she got a chance to study in Europe and I wasn't going to stand in her way. We still talk, but the long-distance thing was no good. 

Maybe if Mio was still here, she would have gotten me to talk about the secret that's been eating me up for a while now.

+++

_I say I'm not psychic, but what I'm not supposed to remember is that I used to be. The part where I lost my powers is a blur; I'm kind of glad because I wake up in the middle of the night sometimes drenched in sweat, and I know I dreamed about it and that it was horrible. As soon as I wake up, though, everything but the panic and sick-feeling aftermath is gone; I remember just enough to know I'm lucky not to remember more. But I'm not supposed to remember the stuff before that part, either, and I haven't told anyone that I actually do._

_There are people who can never know that my memory wasn't wiped, because maybe they'll try again and make it stick this time. And to fool your enemies, sometimes you have to fool your friends first. Or so I tell myself._

+++

"There's been another one," Yuuto said without looking up from his phone. 

We all knew what he meant--another case of some previously normal person going messily crazy in a very public place--but we disagreed on what to do about it. It was obviously something weird and exactly our kind of case, but miraculously this one hadn't even indirectly affected anyone we knew, and since no one had hired us to solve it Tatsuki and Yuuto were against getting involved. Karen wanted photos of it happening but the incidents seemed totally random so she was having no luck so far. I was the only one really determined to stop it, but I didn't even know where I could start, on my own. 

Well. I had one idea, but it was about as appealing as licking the inside of a used basketball shoe. As far as I knew, none of us had seen so much as a hair from Udou's head since freshman year of high school, but obviously he was still out there somewhere, with his partner Kiba. I'd never tried looking for him, to tell the truth. I'd really admired him, even though he was kind of a troll sometimes, so the fact that he was willing to just go in and mess with my head like that was a betrayal I was still pretty mad about, even years later. But if anyone would know how to deal with this, it was him--his powers, after all, were pretty much in the same ballpark.

But swallowing my discomfort ended up being a wasted effort, because Udou was apparently still not ready to be found.

+++

_When I remember pulling Tak-kun's wet, cold, too-still body out of the water, I feel the memories of That Night crowding around the edges of the blur that normally hides them. I know that, for years, I didn't remember that day in the water at all, but it's like the blur can only hide one set of traumatic memories at a time and now that the night I lost my powers is in there, the day Tak-kun drowned trying to save me had to come out._

_What scares me is that my mind chose Tak-kun's death as the lesser evil, and the night I lost my powers as the greater, the one memory that most needed to be hidden. I look at the older memory and I wonder, what could be **worse** than that? And I worry that someday the fog will lift and my mind will answer its own question._

+++

A few days after I'd given up on finding Udou I was alone in the so-called "office." It was actually just a screened-off section of the kitchen of the apartment I shared with Tatsuki, with a dedicated phone line and a computer sitting on a rickety table. Meeting clients in busy public places had worked out pretty well so far--we were lucky that somewhere with lots of bustle and background noise actually felt safe and anonymous to most people--but we'd need a real office someday. Karen was out doing Karen things--taking photos, selling them to who knows where--and both Tatsuki and Yuuto were at their _other_ jobs, the ones they had to actually pay the bills that crime-solving sure didn't. 

I was supposed to be studying, but I wasn't getting anywhere. There'd been two more incidents, bringing the total to seventeen, and I was finding it hard to concentrate on anything else. So when the "office" phone rang, it seemed like a pretty good excuse to give up on hoping for some sort of studying-related psychic power to spontaneously develop and rescue me from learning things the hard way. "Hands On Private Investigators, how may I help you?"

The next thing I remember, I was halfway down the building's stairs, on my way to... somewhere. And for the first time _ever_ I was really, really glad that just a few years before someone had tried to erase my memories, because I recognised the feeling of having my head messed with, and that stopped me in my tracks. As soon as I realised that something was wrong, though, I couldn't remember who had called, or what they'd said, or where I was supposed to meet them. 

I bolted back up the stairs to check the caller ID on the phone, but it was like the call had never happened. It wasn't a blocked number, there was just no record of the call at all. So either there was a psychic out there who could use their powers through the phone, _and_ erase any trace of the call, or I was going crazy. 

How scary is it when "I could be losing my mind" seems like the better option?

+++

_It's more than a little freaky to know that I used to have enough power to bring someone back from the dead; I don't think any human being should have that kind of power. Tatsuki is supposed to have every bit of my power now, since I gave it all to him, but somehow his abilities don't feel as freaky to me. Oh, it's scary that he can level a building with a flick of his brain, don't get me wrong, but no matter how strong Tatsuki gets he never seems to develop any powers that can mess with someone's mind or soul; all his powers are pretty firmly based in the physical world. Even seeing the past: he can see what someone did, but he can't see inside their head._

_Wiping memories? Creating new ones? Making people do things they would never want to do? That's messed up, and it messes up the people who have those powers. I don't know what made me give all my powers to Tatsuki, though I can kinda guess, but if I'd been allowed to keep them--allowed to have power over life itself--would I have turned sour eventually, too?_

+++

I would probably still never admit this out loud, but I trust Tatsuki more than anyone else in the world, and Yuuto comes a pretty close second. I trust them to have my back so much that when I have time to make just one phone call in an emergency, I call Tatsuki instead of 119. But, see, the more time I have to think about it, the _less_ likely it is that I'm going to bring my friends into a bad situation, because that same knowledge--that they would put themselves between me and whatever it is that is trying to hurt me--means that I don't want them anywhere near danger. After all, I have the exact same drive to protect them as they do to protect me.

So did I think they'd believe me about the phone call? Totally. Which was exactly why I couldn't possibly tell them. 

I'm not as stupid as I used to be, though, now that I know what kind of stuff is out there. I tried finding Kiba first, I really did. And he was as impossible to track down as Udou was. And since that was the end of the list of "psychic people I know who aren't actively evil and who I don't care about endangering," I pretty much gave up on having backup.

Which left me with two options, both ugly. I could sit back and hope that the mysterious phone call was related to the mass insanity going around (and I really, really did hope it was, because if there were _two_ mind-controlling psychics out there with mayhem on their minds, then we were all just completely fucked) and that Kiba and Udou were AWOL because they were handling it. But that would leave me vulnerable until they _did_ handle it, if that was even what was going on. Maybe they were actually off "helping" some other poor teenage psychic like they "helped" me and Tatsuki back in the day. On the other hand, I could try to deal with the problem myself. Too bad I had no clues and no useful abilities (the day when my epic basketball skills are the key to solving a case will come, but this obviously isn't it).

If I didn't want to involve Tatsuki or Yuuto, then the only option I had left was to wait for the mind-controller to come to me again. And lucky me, she did.

+++

_Sometimes, I don't know how to talk to Yuuto or to Tatsuki. Especially Tatsuki. There's always undercurrents there with Tatsuki, weird lulls in the conversation while we talk around the things the other person isn't supposed to know, and the questions we're afraid to know the answers to. I can't be sure what he's thinking when he goes all hunched and silent, like the Tatsuki of the bad old days, or when he starts to say something and then abruptly veers off into a snide comment. It hurts, not to be able to tell him that I know, I know the cold exterior was never real, that it was a defense built out of desperation._

_But pretending ignorance is **my** defense of last resort. And if my fake exterior is a little happier, a little more innocent, than the real me inside, at least it's a defense that doesn't cut anyone but me._

+++

She didn't bother with trying to manipulate my mind directly, this time. I was walking home from work (the job that actually paid, that is) one night, and in the middle of the crosswalk a total stranger turned to me and said, "You're much more interesting than I had been led to believe, Oohira Kotarou. I think we should talk, just the two of us." And then he blinked, and looked at me in total confusion for a second before continuing on his way like nothing had happened. And as I turned to watch him go, there she was, waving at me from the sidewalk. 

She was one of the most beautiful women I'd ever seen, and that's counting models and actresses. And I wiggled that thought around in my head like a loose mental tooth, but it felt pretty genuine. She wasn't using her powers to make herself seem better looking, she really was just that pretty. Which seemed kind of unfair, but then Udou and Kiba had the same thing going--tall, good-looking _and_ powerful. So did Tatsuki, but only the "tall and good-looking" part was something he was born with. It made him slightly less hateable.

I still had, at best, only the tiniest fraction of an idea of how to stop her, but if I let her walk away without following I knew I wouldn't even have that anymore. Best case scenario, she'd decide I _was_ boring, after all, and I'd never hear from her again except in the news. Worst-case, someone she'd messed with would stab me in the back some night and that would be that. So, I followed her. 

Eventually we ended up in one of those abandoned buildings that my kidnappers almost always seem to take me to. Except the one who took me to the morgue. That sucked. I'll take the creepy abandoned warehouses any day, after that.

"How did you shake off my control? Did Udou teach you that trick?"

There wasn't much she could have said that would have shaken me worse, but I tried to play down my distress; fat lot of good it would do me if she could read auras, though. I hadn't ever been a very good actor, but four years of keeping secrets had taught me to keep it simple. "I haven't seen Udou in years." Which was 100% true, of course. 

"That's true," she said, echoing my own thoughts. "I lost interest in you when he did, originally. But here you are. So maybe he didn't teach you on _purpose_."

Too close to the mark. If I'd realised she _knew_ Udou... well, I still would have come, let's be real. She was hurting people, and if she'd turned her sights on me it wouldn't be long before Tatsuki and Yuuto came under fire, too. This could be good, in way, actually, if I could keep her on the topic of Udou. "What does my basketball senpai have to do with anything, anyway?"

She sighed, and made a disappointed little noise, and then there was a sharp pain in my knee and I was on the floor of the warehouse, biting back a scream. My leg was bent at an angle it wasn't supposed to bend and stupidly, all I could think was that this was going to mess up any future I might have had in basketball. I was so wrapped up in my pain that I didn't even notice she'd come close until she crouched down and dug her thumb into my ruined knee. "I'm easily bored, you know. And a while back I thought, what might Udou Kouichi be up to these days? Maybe he's ditched the stiff and gotten fun again. But oh no, no, he'd gotten even more boring. Teaching. Mentoring young psychics. So dull. But then there was you and your little friends, and that disaster was fun to watch, for a while."

Another sigh, and this time it was my left wrist that bent itself backwards with a sickening crack. This time I did scream, and that brought a tiny smile to her face. "But then even you kids got boring. One glorious explosion of gore and tragedy, and then poof. All over. Nothing stays entertaining for very long."

She looked off into the distance for a bit, while I curled into a ball around my broken limbs. The pain was starting to fade away and I knew that was probably a bad thing, but for just a little while before I passed out or went into shock or whatever was happening happened, my head was clear again. "It's been just like old times, the past few weeks. But Udou hasn't taken the bait. Maybe now he will..." 

Before she fully turned her attention to me again, I snapped my good arm out and drove the heel of my hand up into her nose. I couldn't knock her out in one go from this angle, but I could sure as hell hurt her, distract her, maybe buy myself a little time.

+++ 

_I may have skipped over one thing when I talked about what I did in my "free time," before._

_I've been learning to fight._

_I may never be built like Udou or Tatsuki, I may only be 167cm tall, but every centimetre I do have is made of muscle. Basketball gave me strength, and speed, and endurance. Training taught me the best ways to use them to inflict maximum damage in minimum time._

_To hell with being the damsel in distress._

+++

Her broken nose started to gush blood, and a little splattered across my face. For a second, I almost remembered something, but the fog came and swept the memory away before I really saw it.

I was back on my feet--or my one good foot, anyway--before she'd finished staggering back two steps. There wasn't much left but adrenaline and desperation, but those were enough. I pushed off my good leg like I was going for a jump shot, and rammed my shoulder into her gut. We went down hard, and the back of her head hit the concrete floor. I landed on top of her, and rolled off in case she made a grab for me, but she didn't move. My vision was starting to go grey around the edges, but I looked over and saw she was breathing. 

So. Whoever woke up first won, or something. 

+++

_I'll probably always associate the sound of a motorcycle engine being pushed to its limit with Tatsuki. Always, always riding to the rescue on that beat up old CBR. That sound means help is coming, that sound means the danger is about to be over for me, and just starting for him._

_Why am I thinking about that now?_

_Oh._

+++

When I came to, the building was on fire and Tatsuki was lifting me off the floor. I turned my head--or let it fall in the general direction I wanted to look, anyway--to where the woman had been lying, but she was long gone. Shit. She won after all, I guess. 

On the up side, Tatsuki didn't get hurt trying to protect me this time. A little light smoke inhalation, maybe. 

My mind was wandering, to say the least. Which is the only excuse I can think of for why I blurted out, "You're not supposed to be able to find me like this anymore, since our powers stopped being linked."

Tatsuki froze for a second, but I guess the whole 'building on fire' thing was slightly more important than my big, stupid mouth, because he got back to hauling my limp carcass out of there and all he said was, "I tracked the GPS in your _phone_ , genius."

Oops. 

+++

_How many times have Tatsuki and I ended up in a barely-conscious pile of bloodied limbs? Is it bad that I've lost count? It's probably bad._

_But I can't bring myself to see it that way, because no matter how much I'm hurting, or he's hurting, or we're both hurting, falling asleep next to him is the best feeling I know._

+++

I did wake up lying next to Tatsuki, and nothing hurt. 

Not in a cheesy, he-makes-me-not-care-about-pain kind of way, though that's true too, but in a more literal kind of way. 

We were in our apartment, instead of a hospital, and I could see through the window that the wisteria in the building's courtyard was in full bloom.

Did I mention that this was in January?

+++

_Here's where my memory of the night I gave away my power ends: I asked, "How do I fix a leak?" The answer I got was to destroy the vessel, which is a really stupid answer if you think about it for even a second. You fix a leak by draining the water from the leaking container, not by leaving nowhere for the water to go. Then you let the container dry out, and seal the crack. What happens next all depends on what kind of water source you're dealing with; if you've got an artificial pond or a pool, you have to refill it, but if you've got a natural spring then it's going to do that all on its own, eventually._

_And as it turns out, psychic power isn't a pool. Psychic power is a wellspring, and mine's been bubbling back towards the surface for a while now._

+++

As much as I wanted to keep lying there with Tatsuki, pretending to sleep and hoping that maybe this whole mess would just go away if I acted like it wasn't there, I also really, really needed to pee. So I got up, trying not to disturb Tatsuki, and limped off to the bathroom. 

Apparently, my knee _did_ still hurt a bit, at least when I put weight on it. That was kind of reassuring; it wasn't _normal_ , clearly the healing parts of my powers were working, but they weren't perfect. And if I couldn't heal a couple broken bones perfectly after four years of my powers building back up, I wasn't going to be bringing anyone back from the dead again any time soon. 

When I got back, Tatsuki was awake and sitting up on the bed. "So," he said, "Your memories aren't gone."

"Uhm. No." Suddenly I found the tatami mat under my feet absolutely fascinating, and vowed to stare at it for a good long while. 

"Your powers aren't gone either." Tatsuki's voice was terribly, terrifyingly neutral, but hell if I was going to look at him and see some awful, angry, hurt look on his face.

"They were. For a while." 

And I guess neither of us could think of much to say to that.

The silence dragged on for an awfully long time before I found the guts to look up at Tatsuki. And he did look hurt, and angry, and confused. But also, maybe just a little, relieved. I can't read auras, but I do know Tatsuki pretty well, these days. What I saw in his face said nothing was broken beyond repair, and that was enough to give me hope.

+++

_So, hey. I'm Oohira Kotarou. I'm 19 years old, 167cm tall, and psychic. I love basketball, my friends, and especially my cousin, Tatsuki. Everything else, I can figure out tomorrow._


End file.
